songs4stayingsane

 I’m a seasonal playlist girl. I let the air decide when I need to cap it off. I always transfer the last few songs from last season's playlist to be my training wheels into a new Spotify playlist that will rule my entire life for the next few months. I don’t actually know when the beginning of spring is but if I can walk outside wearing my favorite green shacket with no other layers then listening to my winter playlist feels sacrilege. These are a few songs that soundtracked my winter of physical injuries and stitches and loneliness and turmoil and feeling weird walking in the dark at 5:45 pm. I lived like a fucking Purple Mountains record. These are a few songs that got me through the rough of it all. The spring will be kinder if we let it. 

Say Hello to the Angels - Interpol 

Turn On The Bright Lights was a true emotional crutch for me this winter. Cold rainy walks to NYC happened as much as drunk Uber rides home staring out into the city listening to Obstacle 2 and PDA. I’ve always cherished this record but it came back swinging full force and hit extra hard this time around. I want to live inside Say Hello to the Angels. I want to have this sung to me with meaning. Such a sexy sultry song that fills me with as much energy as it does lust. If I’m listening to this song while dodging traffic I do feel like I’m in my own low-budget indie flick. Perfect song. Your hair is so pretty and red baby baby you’re really the best :’)))))

I'm Getting Back Into Getting Back Into You - Silver Jews

I can listen to Silver Jews every day of my life and never get tired but something about this song in particular, I can hear it multiple times a day and just replay replay replay. It became relevant when I started seeing someone again for the third time and tried to romanticize our constant battle to make something work. I think I always knew it wouldn’t work but I would listen to this song on my 8-minute walk from my apartment to his. This song feels like snow slush getting stuck on my docs and putting my head down trying to dodge the wind from my bangs but subconsciously doing it in a way where I knew I was doing my version of the walk of shame. Such a beautiful beautiful song. While I hope this song doesn’t become relevant to me in the ways it once was, it will always be in rotation. I’ve been working at the airport bar it’s like Christmas in a submarineeeeeeeeeee. I hope Spring feels more like People by Silver Jews. 

Help Me Scrape the Mucus Off My Brain - Ween

12 Golden Country Greats is a weird comfort album but it works. Piss up a Rope was my most played song of 2024 but Help Me Scrape the Mucus Off My Brain has been a staple for me these past few months. It’s addicting to listen to. I cope lately by embracing lonesome cowboy vibes. I find this song romantic. It’s the nature of my bein’. This is a track that I can count on to hype me up and put me in a good mood. I typically listen to Ween the most walking to work trying to do breathing exercises so I can calm the body. ~~~I am not in New York~~~~~I am on the farm~~~Everything is ok~~~~ Whatever it works for me. And if you really love me baby!!!! Help me scrape the mucus off my brain!!!!! 

Bare Hands - PUP

If an album can be your best friend, Morbid Stuff by PUP takes the spot for me. This record came out when I was 17 and continues to be relevant to me at 23. Honestly, it started to hit closer and closer to home the older I became. I lived this song. Going back to the same person after they did me wrong time after time, wondering why I seem to trust someone who doesn’t care about me in the slightest. You’re like a bad trip or a sick habit I should’ve left you alone!!!! A few days after I broke it off a song from Morbid Stuff came on which prompted a front-to-back listen that ended up helping me a lot in the process. I cried in the shower to Bare Hands realizing just how much I related. I keep a few records/bands from high school near and dear to my heart while I’ve let others fade away into the hands of newgen emo tiktok teens but Morbid Stuff grows with me. I hope I don’t always feel taken advantage of but until then I have Stefan Babcock to keep me company. 

The Death of Ferdinand de Saussure - The Magnetic Fields 

69 Love Songs is a masterpiece that I feel grateful to listen to. There was a time before college when I didn’t know it existed!!! And that makes me feel crazy!!! Another album that was an emotional crutch for me this winter. I can shuffle it or play it from the top and just let the record take control of me for a while. I Don’t Want To Get Over You was played on an insane loop in 2024 for me and it seems like every few weeks I find a new song off this record to obsessively play and for a while, it was The Death of Ferdinand de Saussure. I listen to this song and gaze out the subway window dissociating to the pattern of “You are nothing I am nothing without love.” I use it as a mantra. As an affirmation. I don’t know anything about love. I’ve barely been IN love but I feel it around me every day it strangles me to sleep every night. Constant thoughts about maybe soon possibly being in love only if I’m lucky and if the penny on the sidewalk is facing upwards. I don’t know anything about love!!!! I did graduate but I am still learning every day thank you Mr. Magnetic Fields. 

Unsolved Mysteries - Animal Collective 

Strawberry Jam is a perfect untouchable album for me. In November I was dancing drunk in my apartment to Peacebone and slipped and fell on my face. Busted my lip in half, broke a tooth, and was out of commission for almost 3 weeks. That was maybe the lowest I’ve been mentally. No social interaction, felt the ugliest I ever have, and didn’t know if I’d look normal again, all because of drunk dancing to anco????? and my slippery socks???? I was asked If I could still listen to Animal Collective after that happened and it would be crazy not to. Panda Bear and Avey Tare didn’t trip me they just simply inspired so much passion that it made me fall. Unsolved Mysteries was a standout for me this winter. Another song I can play on loop and never want to change except maybe to play another song off Strawberry Jam. Jaaaaaaccckkkkkkktheriiipppppeeerrrrrrrrr. This song feels like a warm hug but isn’t that how all songs should feel in the dead of winter?

My spotify is jennaxcaruso. There are lots of playlists there go hunt for treasure and see how I shift and change with the leaves.